While watching Eric Bana’s Love the Beast, I was moved by something Dr. Phil said in the movie.  (I know.  I was surprised too, but check out what he said.)  It struck me, after watching this movie, that I had sold my beast.  The car with which I had a connection.  The car at the center of who I am, what I know about cars, and my closest and dearest friends.  Why did I sell it?  Because this was not enough.

The logical side of my brain tells me that, while Daisy represented who I was, my goals had changed and she no longer represented those goals.  After all, I have long dreamt of rally racing and a front wheel drive, second generation Eagle Talon isn’t exactly the ideal candidate for such a project.  Not that the platform was incapable of dominance, as Kris and Christine Marciniak have demonstrated over the years with their production stock Dodge Neon (which pretty much runs the same engine and transmission), but the interior space in the Talon was extremely tight and, well, I’d rather someone else have her than see her bent in a ditch someday.

I’d hate to see [195] stuffed in a ditch too!

There’s been a lot of blood, sweat and tears invested into this particular Galant since I bought it in the winter of 2005.  I replaced the seized engine shortly after dragging it home from the far side of New Mexico.  I rebuilt that engine soon after, when the head gasket went out in the most spectacular fashion in July of 2007.  I chopped off the entire front end and matched up a replacement from a Galant in a junkyard up in Chino Valley after some retard in a Kia made a left in front of me on the two year anniversary of my taking delivery!  With all that work into the car, it would really, really suck to bend it beyond repair in a rally one day.

Unless I had another Galant VR4!

With money from the sale of Daisy (and my wonderful Volvo), I snatched up a steal of a bargain on 464/1000 from Roger up in Prescott.  Aside from the paint being a little less than perfect, not having any AC, and a janky moonroof, this VR4 is in excellent conditon and I thoroughly enjoying both owning and driving it.  I’ve got power windows and locks, a moonroof, leather seats, cruise control, a turbocharger and all wheel drive.  It’s faster than Daisy was and it’s a total sleeper.  On top of all that, it’s easier to pass emissions, as well as cheaper to register and insure!  The logical side of my brain is pleased.

What happened to the passion, though?

With Daisy, it seemed like I was always on fire for the project, for that next big mod.  I had goals and I was marching towards them.  Then one day, I just sort of gave up on them and went a different direction.  Today, I’ve got these two VR4s, but neither of them has a name – just their numbers.  I don’t even refer to either of them as “her” or “she,” because I don’t view them as having a personality or a soul like I did with Daisy.  Daisy had personality.  Daisy was my sidekick.  These are just two numbered sedans.  They are neither good nor evil.  They just are.

Maybe that fire is getting ready to spread.

Maybe it just might be that I’ve been subconsciously dealing with that sense of betrayal Dr. Phil mentioned to Eric Bana in the movie.  Maybe my putting those parts from Daisy into boxes and sending them off to other people (friends, mostly) has broken what little continuity my life had up until recently.  The fire inside has died down.  I don’t really want to modify [464] and the funding to complete [195]’s evolution into a proper rally car is almost a dream at this point in time, so maybe the fire will just die out completely.

Maybe that fire will be replaced with a wave.

A wave of dirt and dust, that is. I like to think that things will turn around and [195] will become the Mr. Hyde to [464]’s Dr. Jeckyll.  This picture above is one of my favorites of all that I have of the Galants because it’s really me in there, getting [195] sideways out in the middle of a dry lake bed.  I was on the cusp of achieving my dream of having a real rally car that day.  I’ve never been closer.  I think more seat time is in order.  That will probably better introduce me to any personality [195] might have.  I don’t expect to be referring to the car as a female, but I think I can live with calling it my Beast.

And I don’t have to drive it to know it’s there…  waiting.